January 2009
11 posts
One of those nice Hermes scarves gave me this song...
Disgusting Accessories I Have Made Out With
I got really drunk and let the Ove’ Glove give me a handjob.
December 2008
30 posts
OMG is that the belt buckle over there in Hudson News HEYYYYYYYYYYYY HEYYYYYYY over heeeeeeeeeeere remember we met at that party at Barramundi heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyy!
…he didn’t hear me.
::sniff::
You know I really wish that Rex had given me 3G Juice for Christmas like I had asked because there is nothing worse than being in the airport and realizing your charger is in your checked bag and you are getting that awful “Battery life is at 20%” notice on your iPhone.
In other news, The Frisky has chosen me as the... →
When I Need To Think Happy Thoughts I Dream Of
1. Getting washed 2. World peace 3. Freedom 3. Lockhart Steele’s monogrammed Tiffany’s belt buckle. Mmmmmmm.
youngmanhattanite:
But really, Rex’s life is a hide-n-seek game through the Approval Matrix quadrants.
And yet, no mention of me. I WANT MY NAME IN LIGHTS, DAMN IT.
Rex PLEASE STOP wanking to party photos of yourself with the bug-eyed skull scarf chick again YOU ALWAYS MAKE SUCH A GODDAMN MESS wait don’t you even think of reaching over here for a second there buddy DON’T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT one of your gay little argyle socks is lying on the floor next to the bed FUCKING USE THAT ASSHOLE No don’t touch me GET AWAY NO I SAID NO GODDAMNIT oh...
Hey, you know who’s COOL? Steven Tyler. Know why? HE WEARS SCARVES.
Heeeeeeeeeeeey Reeeeeex heeeeeeeeyyyy Rex it’s your scarf hey hey remember me? Over here I was just kidding about choking you I was just jealous because of those STUPID SKULLS WHICH ARE UGLY I loooooove you hey Rex Rex cmon man we’ve had so many good times together remember those twins in the Fargo airport? Hey hey Rex Rex cmon maaaaan at least put me in the wash
I HATE stupid skulls they are STUPID and DONT YOU JUDGE ME its not my fault you dropped me in a beer puddle and I SOAKED IT ALL UP I can stop at any time
Rex I know Rachel couldn’t come over last night and I’m sorry about that but FOR THE LAST TIME I am not a cum rag
No I AM NOT Rex’s costume for SantaCon I am just NORMALLY FESTIVE what are you implying
Rex and I were watching Heroes on our DVR this morning and I was all CLAIRE BENNETT I TOTALLY RELATE because we are both INDESTRUCTIBLE BY FIRE it is so useful being flame retardant
Sometimes when I am bored and hanging out in coat check I fuck with the hats by repeating SORGATZ SORGATZ SORGATZ over and over they think I am talking about them but HA I’M NOT hats are dumb
Rex THIS IS YOUR SCARF TALKING it is not the summer anymore you need to STOP wearing Tommy Girl and switch to Be Delicious
Hey people buying Christmas presents for Rex you should get him something like socks but don’t get him another scarf HE ALREADY HAS ONE OKAY
Sometimes I wish we would move to Alaska because then Rex would wear me all the time OH GOD THE NIGHTS ARE LONELY
I am so proud of the way I contribute to Rex’s masculinity but DUDE you need to get rid of that silver jacket it is totally gay
Ooh, is that a shooting STAR?? I wanna make a wish OH WAIT nevermind that’s just Rex’s earring.
hey is that Rachel girl coming around today because her hair is soft and I like to make it staticky
hey rex’s shirt with all of those stripes YOU’RE GIVING ME VERTIGO or is rex’s hair gel making me high